Rape: Use your words (but not that one)

Nothing makes me feel more sick than seeing the word "rape" used casually, including rape jokes, and using rape as verb to describe something that definitely is not rape.  "We got raped at that football game." "That girl is rapeable". "My maths exam raped me". Absolutely disgusting. Rape is not a word that should be used in an everyday context. Unless you're talking about something that legitimately was rape (in which case, no one would be laughing), you're not using the right word.

I find the use of the word "rape" in any conversation where you're not actually speaking about rape absolutely deplorable, however especially in the context of someone finding someone "rapeable". What, you think they're hot, so that makes it excusable for you to forcefully have sex with them? Wow. You're so cool. What a drop kick.

Using this word in such an every day context trivialises the idea of rape. Don't tell me you're having a laugh. Don't tell me I'm being sensitive. Don't tell me to get a sense of humour. People who are making rape jokes have never been raped, they don't worry about being raped, they probably don't know an who has been raped, and they're actually legitimising the actions of rapists or potential rapists by making their actions seem more socially acceptable, as well as reminding victims of sexual assault and rape of what may have occurred.

While rape does not only affect women, it is something that primarily affects women, and we don't find the use of the term funny at all. Rape jokes? Not even slightly humorous. I'd rather a good old "knock knock" joke. I don't find rape jokes funny because the threat of sexual assault or rape is something that legitimately frightens me; something that sees me not going for walks by myself when it's dark, makes me careful about taking public transport by myself, causes me to not even consider taking a taxi alone, and causes me to freeze if I hear a noise when I'm home by myself at night. And while being alone may freak me out a little bit, I know that I'm not alone when it comes to hatred of rape jokes and of the term "rape" being used so casually.

I read on Tumblr (hem, again) a story about a classroom in America, when a student was talking about someone else's sexual assault, and another student said something along the lines of "she should have been in the kitchen, then it wouldn't have happened!" We do not need to culture this ignorance, this stupidity, this victim shaming. "Just a joke!"? It's not funny, and it can't go on.

An example of the idea of "rape" being thrown around? Robin Thicke. Don't even get me started (well, I've started). As catchy as the song "Blurred Lines" is, it's pretty disgusting when you listen to the lyrics. "I know you want it". No, you think she wants it. But hey, because she said no, what you think she does or doesn't want is out of the equation. Back off. The song actually got banned from some student pubs in England - this move was accused of being too politically correct. I personally don't see what is wrong with banning something that is essentially rape propaganda.

Get a little bit more creative with your language. "Wow, that team was much better than us at football. We got a bit destroyed". "Wow, that girl is very pretty". "I just got owned by my maths exam". "Goodness gracious golly gosh I wrote like a bumbling baboon in my English exam".

Nothing I love more than calling people out for being racist/ sexist and seeing them squirm awkwardly (I sound awful. Ah well, better they learn now). I mean, chances are, if someone says "I got raped by my maths exam" and you ask them to explain, they'll be sitting there opening and closing their mouth like a goldfish, realising that no, they weren't raped by their maths exam. They struggled a bit to answer everything, they wish that they had studied harder, and the exam was more difficult than they expected. They were not raped in anyway way, shape, or form, by that maths exam.

"You know that that's not what I meant". Yeah, I do. I don't know why you used that word though. There's nothing wrong with a bit of exaggeration, however using the word "rape" isn't exaggeration - it's just stupid. There's a difference between something taking away your choices, something removing all control from you, something done to create fear and something as life changing as rape, and exaggerating about something a little.

I'm sick of terms like "rape" being thrown around in every day language. It's not okay. Rape and sexual assault in general are not funny - the sheer thought of them is terrifying, they're life altering, soul crushing, and not even remotely humorous.

Next time you try to be a bit cute and use "rape" as a term to describe something you find difficult, take it back. It's not rape. You know that. Next time you describe someone as "rapeable", take a step back and really think about what you're saying. You're surely not thinking that the way they look excuses something as awful as rape, are you? No? I didn't think so. So why do you feel the need to say that? And if you think it does excuse it? You really need to take a look at yourself, and quite possibly talk to someone.

To give us all a bit of credit - the vast majority of people understand that rape and sexual assault is so, incredibly wrong. That's why we all need to stop casually using the word "rape" in every day language - it's not what we mean. And as for Robin Thicke? People are slowly starting to wake up to the fact that his lyrics and attitudes are not even remotely okay - #AskThicke on Twitter was a PR nightmare - here are some gems below.

Rape is NEVER funny. Use your words, get more original with your vocabulary, and stop using the word "rape" where it doesn't belong. We're all smarter than that. It's not cute, it's not funny, no one has any idea what you're talking about, and yes, when you talk about being "raped" by an exam, you do sound like a bumbling baboon.

Part of the #YesAllWomen movement.

University Wars: Artscism

I'm not a huge fan of the Articism (new term - I made it up) that I have faced ever since I started university. I am an Arts student, and I'm proud of that. I don't mind it when people poke fun at me a little bit, and when teasing is done in jest - I can take that as well as the next person, and I don't mind having a bit of a joke about my lack of contact hours. A little bit of teasing about what I'll do after my degree is fine, I can take a joke, and yeah, Arts degrees aren't exactly renowned for producing high earning graduates.

However, what really annoys me is when people say "what can you even do with an Arts degree?" and, the ever famous (and oh-so-original), *insert obnoxious comment about burger flipping here*. There's nothing wrong with working at a fast food joint - it's just not where I hope my degree will take me, and it's not where I'm planning on working. "What are you going to do with an Arts degree?" and "what are you going to do with an ARTS degree?!?!" are not the same thing - I think you can probably tell the difference.

I'll tell you where my Arts degree is going to get me. It's going to get me into a career that I am happy with. It will (hopefully) get me into postgrad studies in the field that I am interested in. It will show future employees that I had the time, effort and dedication to work through a three year degree, all the while working several part time jobs, travelling, and everything else I have set my mind to. I see my degree as a way of getting me into postgraduate studies (although I could get work based on my Arts degree, especially with my majors as Communications and Political Science/ International Relations). A lot of jobs in the fields of work I'm interested in don't really care what you studied (just that you studied), just if you can do your job well.

The thing is, with a lot of undergraduate degrees, you need to do postgraduate studies to make full use of them. Undergraduate degrees such as physio and occupational therapy will allow you to work in that field, however studying human biology isn't going to make you a doctor, and studying pharmacology as a major of a science degree won't allow you to work in that field until you study it as a postgraduate degree. A lot of people, regardless of whether they are interested in science, arts, design, whatever, study broad undergraduate degrees prior to specifying postgrad.

I work hard for my degree. Yes, I have a low number of contact hours. However, for several of my units, I have a minimum allocation of 50 pages of reading a week, usually in complex language on difficult to comprehend political issues. I have 3000 word essays (and boy, they feel like 6000 words). I still have a lot to do - however, instead of readings and essays being structured into my contact hours - like labs, lectures and tutes - I need to discipline myself and make sure I do them when I'm not at uni. Arts degrees are different to other degrees because instead of learning and regurgitating facts and equations, there is a focus on expression (e.g. essays) and debating your point of view.

While sciences and maths aren't my strong point (nothing quite like that slap in the face after studying for hours for your Year 10 physics final and ending up with 49%), I have a passion for the written word, history, drama, politics, communications, and other artsy subjects. Why would I push myself to study subjects I dislike and that I'm not good at, instead of following my passion? Much as I would love to be drawn to medicine and make millions as a surgeon, it ain't going to happen, and I've accepted that.

There probably are some people who are doing an Arts degree because for them, it's easy. However, that's not everyone. There are probably some people studying Commerce because numbers come easy for them - they don't have to work hard at that. Does that make what they're doing the easy way out? Why don't they cop flak for studying numbers because they hate writing essays?

As for the specific criticism over majors - people study what they want because it interests them, or because of the career that it will get them into. For example, History of Art majors. This always seems to be the major that I hear copping a lot of flak. I have never done a unit associated with History or the History of Art, however I can imagine why people would be studying it. Firstly: it interests them, and they are coupling this major with a second major that relates to their chosen field of work. Secondly (and woah, this one is revolutionary): They want to work with art's history. What? Wow? No? Never!!

Why would I study Commerce when finance and numbers do not interest me? Why would I study Design when I can't draw and it's not something I find fun? (Little story - I drew a self portrait in Year 7 Art and took it home, super excited, to show mum. Her response? "Wow Laura, that's great! Who is it?") Why would I study Science when the longest I lasted in one science unit at my university was 2 hours? (It wasn't too hard, rocks just do not interest me).

So no, I don't mind if you have a joke with me about how I'm studying an Arts degree. You're right - I don't have many contact hours, and what I'm studying probably doesn't seem as hard to you as the wacky engineering stuff you spend your time on. It's okay if you tease me about only going to uni twice a week - I admire you making it in for every health science lecture and tute, really, you're much more dedicated them me!

Obviously Arts degrees aren't the only ones that cop it, and I think we should all be a little bit more encouraging of each other's studies. At the end of the day, us uni students are all in this together - juggling exams, coursework, classes, working, friends, eating, sleeping, trying to keep fit, and also remaining somewhat sane at the same time. Shouldn't we all support each other?

If you legitimately think that an Arts degree is the easy way out (and plan on shouting that from the rooftops instead of keeping it to yourself), two things: 1) Go and write a Political Science essay and let me know how you go. And 2) Make your own damn cheeseburger, because with the amount of work I put into my studies instead of putting everyone else down about their degrees, I won't be the one who ends up in a career that I don't want.

Be appreciative, be humble. Turn back the boats…or should we?

Before I start, I just wanted to quickly define the terms asylum seeker and refugee. Prior to writing this post, I wasn't entirely sure what the difference between the two was - hopefully this helps you if you have the same problem. Asylum seeker - someone seeking international protection but whose claim for refugee status has not yet been determined. Refugee - someone who has been recognised under the 1951 Convention relating to the status of refugees as a refugee - "owing to well-founded fear of being persecuted for reasons of race, religion, nationality, membership of a particular social group or political opinion, is outside the country of his nationality and is unable or, owing to such fear, is unwilling to avail himself of the protection of that country; or who, not having a nationality and being outside the country of his former habitual residence as a result of such events, is unable or, owing to such fear, is unwilling to return to it...". Source

Something that has been tossed around on the news a lot lately is about asylum seekers, and whether they should be allowed to arrive and/ or settle in Australia. I am honestly astounded that in a country as fortunate as ours, that I am proud to be part of, so many people are against this. Yes, I understand that not everyone who comes to Australia on a boat is a legitimate asylum seeker. I understand that there have been people in the past who have connections to terrorist organisations. But when you tell me we should not let LEGITIMATE refugees into Australia after they have arrived on a boat, I want you to answer a few questions for me.

What did you do to allow you to be born in a country as fortunate and prosperous as ours? How come you're allowed to receive government benefits if necessary, be able to walk outside without a fear of being shot, and have access to government funded education? How come you can choose what religion to practise, or not to practice religion at all? How come you weren't born in a country that you need to escape from? What makes you so special?

Once again, yes, I know that not everyone arriving on a boat is a legitimate asylum seeker. I also know that there are other ways of looking for a safe country to live in. I also understand that by allowing people to settle into our country this way, we are encouraging more people to risk their lives in travelling to Australia. However, although Tony Abbott's measures have stemmed the flow of boats, there are still boats arriving in Australia. Imagine if risking your life by floating on the back of a vessel that can be hardly be called a boat was preferable to staying in your own country?

People toss around that asylum seekers shouldn't be allowed to travel to our country because it's illegal. Actually, it is legal. I have heard of "the right of asylum" before however I never had properly looked into it before. Today, I did. It's an "ancient juridical concept", under which a person prosecuted in their home country may be protected by another foreign country. Therefore, people who are traveling to Australia "illegally" on boats, due to fears of racial or religious prosecution in their home country, are actually within their rights to do so (once again, I know people can seek asylum in alternative ways).

When people speak about how we shouldn't do something, e.g. travel or wear a certain brand because people who are less fortunate than us cannot, I don't believe this is correct. We have been given a fantastic opportunity in life, whether that is to afford education, travel, shopping or having a car, and I think we should take advantage of the opportunities that are offered to us and enjoy them. We have worked hard to be able to afford these things, as so I think we should embrace them and appreciate them. Feeling bad about situations in other countries will only make you upset - it's not going to change anything. Instead, I want to embrace my opportunities for me, but also use them to help other people.

However, we have been born into a country where you are rewarded if you work hard. I understand that Australia isn't perfect - we have homeless people, we have our own issues, however in comparison to so many other countries in the world, we are so lucky. We have been born into a country where education at a high school level is a right, and where higher education loans are low interest and simple to obtain. I am fortunate that, as a girl, I was born into a country where education is a real possibility and opportunity for me; where me receiving an education and going to university is encouraged on the same level as for my male counterparts. We have been put into a position that has allowed us to be rewarded for our hard work, and therefore, be able to afford things like those mentioned above, as well as being able to live a life free from punishment due to our races or religions. 

On a side note, the fact that the Australian government is considering sending refugees to Cambodia makes me feel a little sick. After spending time there during the summer, I came to realise how although it is a beautiful country, it is also very impoverished, and the government is not completely honest with its people. The only people who will be benefiting from asylum seekers originally heading to Australia being sent to Cambodia instead are those in power in Cambodia. It is such a vulnerable nation that is still recovering from its own civil war, and their people should be the first priority. On the other hand, refugees being sent to Cambodia may find themselves in a similar, if not worse, living situation than what they had to deal with in their own country.  

We don't realise how lucky we are in Australia.

Have a little bit of empathy for people who aren't as fortunate as you are. There is nothing but chance allowing you to live the life that you lead - nothing but chance putting you into a position where hard work is rewarded (and unfortunately, not so hard work is also rewarded). So yes, work hard, and appreciate your earnings - but remember, you are only getting what you receive because of a little stroke of luck. I'm not proposing that we allow everyone in the whole world to live in Australia purely because they arrived here by boat. Please, don't take what I'm saying and make me sound ridiculous and extreme. I'm proposing that we find a little bit of empathy, and be a little bit more understanding of other people's situations throughout the world, because it was only luck that allows us to live the lives we lead - considering almost half the world's population lives on less than $2.50 a day, I feel super fortunate to be in my position. Be appreciative, but also be humble. Turn back the boats...or should we?